Since starting my master’s program, I’ve experienced a big surprise: A debilitating narrative I’ve lived with for over 40 years is suddenly gone!
The effects of childhood trauma are vast, but one of the most debilitating, lasting symptoms for me was a persistent voice that told me, “Johanna, you can’t possibly do ______ .” For years, those words held me back from going after my dreams.
This voice is similar to something I hear regularly from my grief clients. When the worst happens, our brain seems to go into an over-protection mode, trying to keep us from anything else that will bring us mental anguish. And after pain and loss, what could possibly be worse than going after a life you’ve dreamed of and failing?
Before my master’s, my approach to education was to keep my head down and just get by. As the saying goes, Cs get degrees. But a couple weeks ago, I quickly discovered that this was not going to be possible as I entered this new season. For me to get past a midterm, I needed to get over an 86% test grade. Suddenly, I needed to shift into a new gear: One of excellence and focus.
As I walked boldly forward, my actions changed the narrative.
I wonder how many times I’ve sat on the sidelines, inching forward, to do something great and yet have allowed the voice to hold me back. I wonder if I could have gone so much further into something great than when I was just getting by.
What if the answer to our debilitating narratives is to do something wildly incredible and with excellence? What if God is calling me into something beyond my wildest dreams, and He’s just been waiting for me to listen to His voice instead of my own?
A few questions for you today:
- Who’s voice are you listening to today?
- What is the one thing you’ve always dreamed of doing?
- What is God’s voice calling you into today?